Trying to wake up. Day 1.

Joint is the only thing allowed.

6:50
Radiohead - Everything in its right place.
I wake up.
Feels like some nightmare.
what's happening?
My hearth starts to beat faster.
faster, and faster.
Morning, i realize. Morning after three hours of sleep. Feels like yesterday. That was no night.

The plans. the plans I have. Eat. Eat a lot. Have a coffee.
Have a cigarette. No way.

No sense. Have to take a shower.
Okay, I have 15 minutes more.
Eat a lot.
Have a coffee.
Have a cigarette.
No way.

Cold BIO bread, butter and shitty cheese. Even much better we have in Hungary. 2 minutes to go.

Go.

5 minutes passed.

What was that?

go, quick, go..
take large steps! get the elevator! My heart starts to beat fast. faster.

5 more minutes to the tram stop. Can't be late.
Got it.

I don't want to sleep.
Big day today.
I don't want to sleep.
I sleep.

Endpünkt.

Centraal Station. That cache machine will eat a lot of money. I know the company.
Albert Hein to go. 30 chewing gums to go.

15 minutes to haarlem.
I don't want to sleep.
I sleep now.
I sleep now.

Haarlem.

Better. Just take a walk and have a cigarette.
No way.

Nobody working. I'm alone. 20 minutes early. Fuck it. Wont have the money for It. Check the emails.

The snuff is here. Just In case. 29 chewing gums left. Good time.

Stroopwaffels. Just in case.
Energy drink.
Just. In. Case.

8.5 hours passed. No problem. I'm to tired to be worried. Just be awaken. I don't want to sleep.

It's getting better. It's 17:35 and I'm still successful.

Get home. Meet the guy I always meet. He looks like not to be worried about meeting me twice every week. I'm not sure. Like him. But still. No words.

I give him the hand. I saw that. Never give a hand to collegues.
Tram passed.
Amsterdam Sloterdijk, or something like that.

I take off. I always will. The tram 51 is one of the most boring thing you could imagine.

And the way to the Guesthouse.
The Amsterdam Isolation trip. you will get tired of that city if you live here.

Zuid, WTC. Tram 5 is alway crowded. Hate it. The first time I used the mass transit, somebody asked me for a ticket. I didn't have. Really hate the tram five.

You should change. Thing are getting better.

I have to wash the curtains. No energy. Have to work, no energy, have to love, no energy, have to decorate, have to be nice, have to be toghether, have to study, have to plant them, have to clean up.

No energy.

My Room.
Everything in its right place.

Have a Coke. Have a cigarette.
No way.

Have a Cigarette.
No. way.

Take the snuff. Now. The used one will fit you. believe me. 10 minutes are enough. Just drop it out.

Have a beer. Have an oral fixation. Have a beer. And have a beer. Have the oral input. Whatever.

Have some conversation.
Now, You just told what you meant. Perfect. Things getting better. Don't be depressed.
- I'm not.
Great. Go ahead.


Leave now.
Have what you deserve. Go to your room. You have to sleep.
- I have to sleep.
Great. Go ahead.

The room smells nice. 3 incenses made the job.
Roll your tobacco. Roll it, with the alibi having a joint.

good.